Dress Code
As I stroll through the halls of our illustrious school, I am confronted with sights that appall, and smells noxious enough to kill a fully capable adult skunk at three hundred yards. I am referring to your attire, and your personal hygiene.
As I have chatted with a few of you, I have discovered the root cause of these atrocities. Many of you feel that as Evil Overlord, you do as you want. Wear what you want. Groom as you wish. This is wrong! More than anyone, the necessity of your proper dress and groom designates your class in life. Dress like a slob, people will consider you a slob and treat you accordingly. Dress to the amount of respect you want from people, and they will give you that respect. If the people do not respect you, they will constantly struggle to overthrow you. Thus causing your reign to be a troublesome burden for you.
Other than the respect desired from your subjects, you should greatly be concerned with your health. Poor grooming and dress standards lead to poor health. Poor health leads to an early grave. As an Evil Overlord we want to live forever. Rule our people for a long time to come.
Therefore, effective immediately, the suggested dress code is now the mandatory dress code. Anyone found to be breaking this dress code will be publicly executed. The Overlord Academy does not teach second rate students.
For those unaware of the dress code, this quick summary should be enlightening. No clothing should be revealing in any way. Dress as though you were going to church. Show respect in dress to those around you. Show respect to your neighbors by bathing regularly. Wear deodorant. Keep your hair clean, and well combed. If you insist on having facial hair, keep it clean, and neatly trimmed. Stay away from the ZZ Top look.
Can I wear a thong? Or is that off the plan?
If you feel that you must wear a thong, go ahead. As long as no one else has to see it, and you are comfortable wearing it.
Just remember, an Overlord’s day can be a very long one. You may wish to rethink that wardrobe item.
I’m assuming that you have nothing against ZZ Top with that comment…?
And what’s wrong with revealing clothing?? Come on, Overlord! You’re taking away all of the fun!!
There is nothing wrong with others dressing in these fashions. But the Overlord needs to have a look which demands respect. The Overlord needs to be comfortable at all times. Yes, we are taking the fun out of some things, but only to enhance those special moments when we wish to make a surprise visit to the torture chamber after a very long day. You do not want to be the one being tortured.
So, are you saying my facial dress in high school is bad for an overlord? What if it is a long beard, but groomed in a neat way?
You want to be clean and presentable at all times. Your demeanor should demand respect, not be a representation of the degenerate youth.
And yes, your choice in facial grooming in high school was a very poor decision for an evil overlord.
[…] you wear as an Evil Overlord is very important, as discussed earlier. There are some articles of clothing that should never be worn, ever, by anyone. These pieces of […]
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